Come On Baby, Light My Fire

I came back from a trip to New York at the beginning of October and our lighter was missing. I use it to light candles daily and, without a lighter, all we had was one book of matches from a bar we went to once upon a time.

We're down to the last few, so the other day I said to Pete: Next time we're at a bar, let's try and grab a book of matches.

Simple, right?

On Sunday, Pete went to watch football with the boys. He got home and said: Oh, I got this for you. And handed me a lighter.

Oh, but not just any lighter.

This lighter:

There was a phone number and web address, but I blurred it. I guess if you really care, you could google it.

Me: You're serious?

Pete: Yeah, someone left it on the bar so I grabbed it.

Me: Did you even look at it?

Pete: No, you just said you needed a lighter so I got you a lighter.

And this is the point where I handed it to him.

Me: And ... ?

Pete: What? It's a lighter. You needed one right?

Me: Yeah, but did you read it?

Pete: Cape Fear Escorts.

Shaking my head.

Me: That's why someone left it.

But really, he paid no mind to the fact that the only reason it was left was so someone would pick it up and use it in their, um, time of need, not so I could light my candles at home. But Pete saw it, remembered we needed it, and paid no mind to what it said on the front.

BRIDAL BABBLE: Is this married life? Do I have a lifetime of innocent x-rated lighters to look forward to for the rest of my life?